Why I Don't Want To Talk About That Mass Shooting

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This is pretty much the same here.
Mental health care is sort of covered… in that if you’re committed or you go to the ER or the doctor, you can get a prescription or emergency care, but thats pretty much only if you’re in crisis. If you want long term preventative care and you don’t have coverage, you’ll be on a waiting list for a least a year, longer depending on what you need. If you have coverage through your employer, like I do, you’ll get an annual amount of say $600 to use towards a psychiatrist, psychologist or counsellor. So maybe 3 or 4 visits, if you’re lucky?

We have socialized medicine, but not all areas of health are covered.
Eyes, teeth, prescriptions and mental health all can be out of pocket.

We have “good” health care compared to the US, and terrible health care compared to Europe.

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I don’t think so - I wasn’t making a connection to mass shootings and domestic violence because I didn’t think you were; I was just pointing out that there is a connection between domestic violence and homicides, and that the number of women who kill their male spouses is a nontrivial number. Not many of those females go on to kill anyone outside their family though, which means they are not counted as mass murders.

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I’m specifically stating that there is a link between male domestic violence against women and mass shooters.
I mean, I even quote an article that is making that connection?

So yes, men get abused too, I would never say they don’t, but thats not what I was talking about, because, as you say, the women that murder their husbands don’t typically go on mass shooting sprees, and thats what this thread is about no?

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Sorry I misunderstood what you were saying, and that you think I was trying to derail.

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No worries, hence why I phrased it as a question and not an accusation.

That most mass shooters are male and have a history of violence against women is a non-trivial fact, one that deserves exploration and discussion.

But thats a separate conversation from domestic violence in general.

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8 posts were split to a new topic: :frown: Posts tino ate :frown:

mod's notes

Yes, I ate some posts. Thread was getting hard to read.

There were good points- now let’s get this train back on track.

- tinoesroho

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You’re "but what about the menz"ing here. That’s not dialogue, that’s a form of shutting down dialogue. Is that really what you want to do?

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Folks-

Yes, domestic violence is a problem, and yes both men and women can be perpetrators and victims of DV.

However, the same force behind DV appears to affect men and women differently; male perps are much more likely to also commit other crimes, inclusing mass shootings. This is something to keep in mind given this topic’s focus.

Thank you all for contributing.

If we can stick to the topic of the thread, that would be great. Fork a new thread to continue speaking on the issue of DV specifically.

And now, back to our regularly scheduled program.

EDIT:
fixed typos

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I love Sam Bee (and not just because she’s Canadian)

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I can’t even keep up with these

There was another one? In El Paso?

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I got a small, one-week whiteboard calendar for my office. I assign each staffer a color so they can note when they plan to be in the lab. I’m not a super butts-in-seat boss, but having some idea in case I need to have a quick convo/get some paperwork signed is good.

As I was packing my new whiteboard calendar into my work bag, I thought, “This is nice and small. If I needed to provide an accounting of personnel on premises to emergency services, I can just grab it while evacuating the lab.”

God.

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So, I don’t know if you’ve seen the poem going around on FB, I’m sure it’s been on other social media, it’s been floating around since 2016, about different things and the countries they represent, America being represented by a gun (“America is a Gun” is the title of the poem).

Well, one of my FB friends, whom I met after she bought some of the vintage clothing I found after my mom died, made a comment about it a couple days ago: “What’s so negative about being a gun? I’d rather be a gun than a kangaroo!”

I was very surprised, as she has twin sons who are I think seven years old, and a singlet who I think is four. And she’s brought her kids here and we’ve had fun. But she lives aways away, and isn’t as flush as she used to be (who among us is, lol?), so we’ve not seen each other for a year or so. And I had the feeling her husband and males in her family are hunters, that type of thing.

Well, you can imagine some of the comments. Mine was something along the lines of: “Guns are the only tools used to kill other living things, they have no other purpose. They’re being used to kill CHILDREN, some the same age as yours. I can only hope that you’re honestly unaware of what’s happened in the last 24 hours.” That’s not my exact comment, but it’s close; funny how I can remember hers and not mine, but mine was longer.

Anyhow, she blocked me. I can’t see the comment anymore, nor her profile.

I wasn’t insulting. I wanted to be - and thought I could be, though - frank with her as to how her comment came across, you know? I tried to be like gentle-older-lady. Plus, she bought a couple of vintage ties from me and I don’t have her address to send them to her and she’s already paid for them. In fact, the last we messaged each other, she said she was going to try and get out to my place as soon as she could, prolly later in the summer.

I feel hurt, and disappointed. She in her mid-30s. It’s hard for me to reconcile a mother of three lively and bright boys with a person who asks “What’s so negative about being a gun?”

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Yup, and no doubt that’s where she is too. She likes to think of herself as a good person. You just pointed out there’s some major things she could change.

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I just thought she was more evolved in her thinking. I could understand her unfriending me; I could understand her sending me a PM and bitching me out; but blocking - that does say a lot, as much as I hate to admit it. She has another profile up, though, so I sent a message to that, saying, I understand, where can I send the ties, I can’t afford to refund your money.

I mean she really helped me when I needed it when she bought those clothes. And we bonded over Jackie Susann books and movies. It saddens me.

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Here is the poem in question:

img.jpg758×1024 48.8 KB

For starters, these are all things people expect to eat, drink, see, hear, or otherwise experience when they visit a country. Watch football in South America, have a cozy cup of tea in the UK, see kangaroos in Australia, listen to oompah music in Germany, eat goulash in Hungary, or get shot to death in the USA? I know which one I wouldn’t want.

Also, these are things that would be on a placemat map designed for children. You can explain all these things to small children without reducing them to tears except potentially the gun.

The fact that this woman doesn’t understand this saddens me even more than the poem. The entire world sees this country as a bunch of violent mental midgets, and they wouldn’t be wrong. We have an epidemic of gun violence that literally no other country in the developed world has, and not only are we not smart enough to elect people who will solve this problem, but we don’t even see that it is a problem. Instead we just go “well what about car accident deaths hurr durr, does that mean we should ban cars” like that’s in any way a logical argument, and say “ya even mentally ill wife beating neo nazis should have fully auto weapons with hundred round clips, because it’s in the constitution!”

God fucking damnit. I’m so sick of this fucking country.

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Hon, yer preachin’ to the choir. <3

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BTW I’ve spent a fair amount of time around the Oregon District where the Dayton shooting took place. I was involved with the music and art community there for a while. It was basically the only part of that town that felt progressive and accepting and a chill place to be. That was long ago, like when this shooter was ten. But if a younger me was around today, that would have been me and my friends shot and killed that night.

How long do we have to let this go on before we finally put a stop to it? Do our closest friends and family members have to be killed? Even then, would that really make a difference? “Nuh uh, they shot my mom like a dog in the street, but that’s okay just like a car accident, I still support the constitutional right of my killer to have his small penis murder toys!”

What the fuck is wrong with us that we not only fail to put a stop to this, but we actively encourage it? Fuck all of this.

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I don’t know if you knew about this or not: Shooter’s sister was at the scene; she got their with the shooter. More in the article.


I don’t get, either, how this shit isn’t nipped in the goddamn bloody bud. His parents are described as “victims” by the Bellbrook, OH police chief - but they brought that monster into this world. Did they not notice he got the way he did, or just ignore it? That goes for all of them. These aren’t Mansons; they’ve had all the privileges their white maleness entitles them to in this country. You’d think they’d have the capacity and the resources, unilke the lumpen poor, to fix things they think need fixing. Including their own damned emotional/mental illnesses.

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Probably where he got it from.

They’ll be “good people” who voted for Trump because of the economy or something.

There are no doubt a lot of people trying not to think about how maybe they’re Nazis right now.

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