I had the best therapist, when I started considering transition. In Oklahoma City of all places. She worked with most of the trans community there, and that wasn’t really the main focus of her practice. Most of her clients were dealing with PTSD. She worked with a lot of the first responders from the Murrah Federal Building bombing. She was great.
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I had a therapist at the start, she was a trans specialist with twenty-five years experience, and I saw her for just over three years. She helped save me. We had a great rapport, and we both cried when it was time for me to leave. I moved away.
I think about her often.
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That was the sort of thing I daydreamed about too… not going through a transition but a basically instantaneous fix.
Oh yeah, I was trying to remember the name of that place! That was fairly early on in my trying-to-figure-out-this-nonbinary-thing phase.
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I was given the name of a great great etc. grandfather or uncle (I forget which) which matched my sex and gender. However my grandfather soon (like within weeks of my birth) said I should have the same nickname the ancestor used. So that’s what my family, friends, and I always used. The nickname is short for both masculine and feminine names (but is unrelated to my birth name).
Other than the occasional teasing, this caused few problems until I got to junior high school in Virginia in the early 1970’s. Some teachers refused to call me by anything but my real name. I think that’s when I started going from just ignoring the name to actively disliking it. On a side note, the name was also somewhat out of fashion (and still is maybe?).
Eventually I realized I identified completely with my ambiguous nickname, and not with my real name. This came with a lot of thought about subjects like androgyny and the fluidity of gender (and of biological systems in general, where nothing is purely black or white). I was in grad school by then, and they had a legal assistance service. So I got my name legally changed, so as to put my nickname in front of the other two names. Now my preferred name was my real legal first name, and I didn’t have to tell people what to call me.
I’m comfortable with being hetero and binary, and feel fine when people I don’t know on the phone call me Ms. I laugh and tell them I get that all the time. The result of this led me early on to believe that anyone should be able to be whoever or whatever they want to be, and it’s no one else’s damn business.
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Perhaps I should add that I do have problems with anxiety and depression, but that’s mostly due to Crohn’s disease from age 10. So therapy continues.
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I’d like to share an experience I had yesterday. (Halloween 2024); this builds a little on the reply I made upthread about running in girlmode at the office.
The last three years I’ve done crossplay costumes for halloween at work- employees are encouraged to dress up (with a few restrictions, obs.) and since my trans journey started with, of all things, the stereotypical anime maid outfit!, I’ve openly gone in girlmode on halloween.
last year I went as a busty wench, mainly as an excuse to buy me some garb. (and the largest inserts that I could find on Amazon…)
This year I opted to wear a skeleton dress that torrid sold on their site at some point in the past. I purchased some cheap fingerless gloves and knee-high socks to go with the theme, and I used it as an excuse to buy some 5 inch platform heels. (I stand ~6’3" flat-footed; those turn me into a towering mastress. 
)
It’s right on the border of work-appropriate, but it was only for the one day, and I ended up rocking it. Compliments from everyone (including most of the people in HR (my department shares the building with that department)) and the CFO, who had made a surprise visit to talk to a retiring co-worker.
I was practically levitating out of those platform shoes by the time it was over.
Also, I have pictures I’m willing to post, if anyone is interested.
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I, for one, would love to see them!
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The bones extending down on to the boots are chef’s kiss. 
ETA: I have a question actually… would you have felt comfortable posting those on the old place?
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I’m with @politeruin ; the bones stockings are the detail that takes it to the next level.
The gloves are awesome, too. I’ve got to get me a pair of those!
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slaying in that outfit! I love the shoes 
and the bone stockings!
I miss giphy. It made using gifs easy on my phone. You’ll just have to imagine it
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OMG I love that!
I usually go as a witch, because I am one and I just love going as a witch generally and have since I was a kid (there were no signs).
Unfortunately I was taken out of commission yesterday by a health issue and wasn’t able to get out and properly celebrate last night 
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I… honestly don’t know. Possibly.
Sadness! Here’s hoping you feel better soon!
@ everyone else: Thank you all!
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Oh! Beautiful! I love the shoulder cut outs!
Lovely! 
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Ouch 
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