To quote Grace Hopper when she was on some late-night talk show, trying to explain to the young uns about the history of computers: “We used to do that in this country. We used to work together.”
She was talking about the USA, but the point still stands.
Canadians have a remarkable sense of unity when it comes to external threats. Maybe that’s why we join allies in wartime so quickly.
OMG have we driven this poor man to a heart attack? I never realized how much we had upset our neighbours. Should we apologize?
(If my comment comes across as a bit callous, make of it what you will.)
Can you keep it up? Whatever you are doing?
The strain of saying ridiculous nasty things about Canada was too much for him.
(Normally I would not joke about such a situation, but come on. If there is a god…)
Still in beta. We hope to release it under a Creative Commons license soon.
The lightning bolt missed.
Reminds me of an old joke.
A priest and a lawyer are golfing. On the first hole, the priest gets his shot on the fairway, but the lawyer ends up in the trees. The lawyer cries out in frustration, “Goddamnit, I missed!”
The priest gives the lawyer a stern look, and says, “You should be careful about taking the Lord’s name in vain, or you may face His wrath.”
The lawyer just shrugs, and they continue to where their balls lie. The priest hits the ball well, and ends up on the green. The lawyer’s shot cuts right, ending up in the sand trap.
“Goddamnit, I missed!” curses the lawyer.
This time, the priest pulls the lawyer aside, and tells him, “Seriously, this is a really bad sin. It’s my job to look out for your immortal soul, and, if you keep this up, something much worse than a bad game of golf is going to come your way.” The lawyer shrugs, and the two go to play their balls where they lie.
The priest makes an amazing putt, and thanks the Lord for his good fortune. The lawyer, overcome with frustration, hits the ball way too hard, and it ends up in the drink. With the eyes of the priest glaring at him, he exclaims to the heavens, at the top of his lungs, “Goddamnit, I missed!”
The priest just shakes his head sadly, and, after a few more shots, the lawyer manages to sink his putt, and they continue on to the next hole.
As they walk, the lawyer says to the priest, “Look, I appreciate the thought, but I’m an atheist. I don’t believe in God, much less that he’s going to hurt me because of my foul mouth. So, why don’t we just play on, and you can keep your delusions of an imaginary sky-being to yourself.”
The priest sighs, says, “Very well,” and starts his backswing. At that moment, a bolt of lightning comes down from the heavens, hits the upraised golf club, and strikes the priest dead.
From far above comes a booming voice, which resounds with, “Goddamnit, I missed!”
Dear Donald
That sound you hear? It’s the sound of an entire country coming together to give you a Salmon Arm salute.
I’m thinking the Chicken Cannon might be more appropriate…
Edit: I just looked up the “Salmon Arm Salute,” and now I’m thinking…
Chicken Cannon might be under-powered. If anyone ever deserved a cluster of F-bombs…
Doug Ford looks like a walking heart attack already. Now I’m not telling you what to do, but…
TIL:
In 1982, then-prime minister Pierre Trudeau was travelling with his sons on a train through Salmon Arm, B.C. during a vacation. Met by protesters unhappy with his handling of the economy, Trudeau gave them the middle finger. The gesture became known as the “Salmon Arm Salute.”
I hope you aren’t suggesting any action that would violate the spirit of our constitution.
The Canadian Frown of Disapproval is taught to all schoolchildren, beginning in Grade 3, but the ethical considerations regarding its use are taught as paramount. The CFD is only to be used against foreign enemies of our nation, and then only preferably in self-defense.
I don’t believe Mr. Kudlow was deliberately CFD’d. He’s too trivial a target for such an attack, and we are not, in most circumstances, a vengeful nation. It’s more likely that he watched too many Canadian news sources and received a cumulative but still sub-lethal dose.
I’m sure I speak for all or most Canadians when I extend to Mr. Kudlow the traditional “sorry” and our wishes for a swift recovery, and our sincere hope that he does not get mangled by a manure spreader or develop tertiary syphilis or get eaten by snakes in the near future.
We must be thankful that he was not travelling through Dildo, NL.
The “special place in Hell” response legitimately cracked me up.
I keep wondering if this has anything to do with the pussy hats.
Either way: there are people saying cross-border travel is a privilege, not a right. Sure, fine, but the time to tell someone they can’t cross over (all else being equal) is before they try and cross, given that they’d already obtained all the permits etc. If someone has the sales tax permit, has been accepted as a vendor at the festival, has filled out all the other permits, etc. etc., this is just being a jerk.
Not to mention the whole point of these festivals is to get access to vendors outside of the usual locals.
So remember when we were talking about how by the time you go to university you should be a grown-up?
Lee, who lives in Toronto, never responded to the lawsuit or defended herself, leading Corbett to find her liable by default
Yeah, that official looking court document just might be real.
My kingdom for an actual, candid reply from Trudeau to this letter.
