I earn a healthy amount of money. I have a lovely house, a mortgage and a loving wife and child. I have money to spend on things I need and want. I have, for some people’s definition, “it all”.
Only, I don’t have time to use those things I wanted, or to do even the things I remain unmotivated to do, like work on poor fitness, or do things I crave to do: creatively-satisfying things that have little to no reward or consequence. Let alone the things I should be doing like volunteering, being generous and helping charities.
I eek out moments between responsibility to family and employer on ‘popcorn’ like mobile games, social networks and video content. Any time I have time to put aside for the real ‘meat and potatoes’ the energy is already spent.
I’m resource-rich but time-poor.
What do?
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Pick one thing.
You can’t train for an Iron Man while donating time and money to a dozen different causes and still have time for minor inconveniences like work and family.
Pick one organization – whose mission and philosophy you agree with – that you feel does an excellent job at whatever is they do. Find time to volunteer for one thing to help them. Set up a monthly automatic donation. Go to one or two of their events (preferably NOT the annual gala) to meet more people who are interested in this subject you’re interested in.
You can’t do everything. You can do one thing. And then, like building muscle endurance, you’ll start to be able to do two things, possibly even three. Or, you’ll decide that doing one thing to the best of your ability IS the best way to give back.
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This is why I’m trying to leave my day job and become a full time self-employed yoga teacher. Sitting all day is literally killing me. I want a creative lifestyle that doesn’t leave me drained.
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I can’t really give advice because my shit is fucked right now. But I’ve found subtle tweaks to my schedule to be really helpful. Right now, I run my daughter to daycare in the AM. It only takes about 10 min longer than driving her would, and I get a 5k in. Same with bike commuting, rather than driving. As I get more pregnant, that will probably collapse into “walk daughter to daycare on the way to school.”
For after-work hours, I do what @chgoliz suggests. One thing. Maybe it’s cooking a nice meal that will get me leftovers for the rest of the work week. Maybe it’s writing my reps. But more than one solid thing, and I’m wiped. Make your one count and forget the guilt.
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Pick one thing and schedule it. Make sure everyone knows that (for example) Thursday between 7pm and 10pm is when you do (thing). You don’t have to tell everyone what (thing) is, but make it like you would an appointment.
It’s easy to let things go when you think you’ll find time to do them. Creating an appointment to do them helps cement it in your mind that the thing is something that needs to happen, and helps everyone else with boundaries (don’t contact you at that time).
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Probably why I’m a serial hobbyist. Though discarding the previous hobby’s accouterments is always a painful process of letting go
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I think I’m gonna focus on meditation and reflection for starters. Then reading: I can read wherever and whenever, and it does bring me lots of joy.
I know what you mean. Art supplies of various media, a USB DJ mixing board, an Arduino, a ukulele, a trail bicycle, 1000+ games on Steam, a stack of books on a multitude of subjects. I might just work on the books for now.
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Prioritize, perhaps? Maybe that can be part of meditative and/or reflective times?
What’s sincerely and truly vital to you?
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You can join my facebook group if you like.
Or, Insight Timer App - highly recommended.
Invite me: I’m glutnix on facebook/messenger/twitter/all-the-things.