If people know who it was why hasn’t anyone ever asked them?
Oh, that’s why. I guess it will forever be a really stupid mystery.
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I’ve been looking for a source for information on interpersonal power dynamics in relationships. I saw this linked in a reddit forum I participate in and it’s really useful in spelling out specific behaviors that men use (and I think in general that people use within relationships). It’s not the most well-written paper I’ve ever read, but it has at least some behaviors to observe. It seems to be a worksheet with a lot of blank lines; I might run this through an AI and see if I can get it into a more succinct list.
In theory, a good therapist could help a couple work on these within their own relationship, but I think that involves a man seeking to relinquish his power over, and I think that many men are brought up with this dynamic and reluctant to let go of it.
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Incidentally, if anyone is looking for a non-Scribd version:
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Ha! In Germany, men have eggs! Inside our scrotopodes and everything!
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If you mean what I think you mean, spanish speakers are there with you…
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Turkic languages, too…
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It’s the more logical description compared to the English one, shape-wise
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What’s urgently needed is a revolution in the way domestic abuse is understood and handled by the criminal justice system. Allowing abusive men to avoid convictions is a failure of justice for their victims, but it also has terrifying implications for society as a whole. A domestic abuser register, along the lines of the sex offender register, would protect women by allowing monitoring of perpetrators released on licence.
But it’s not just the partners of such men who need to be protected. As last summer’s scenes of burning buildings and police cars showed, dangerous men are not choosy about their targets. A year on, the link between private and public violence has never been clearer.
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Here’s the AI summary:
Here is a summarized list of observable behaviors associated with Everyday Male Chauvinism, categorized by type, from the document you provided:
1. Coercive Everyday Male Chauvinism
- Intimidation: Uses tone, gestures, or looks to induce fear or compliance.
- Financial control: Controls shared money, withholds funds, tracks spending, hides financial info.
- Domination of time and space: Controls household space (e.g., monopolizes TV or seating), prioritizes own time over others’.
- Overwhelming repetition: Repeats arguments or demands until the partner gives in.
- Forced intimacy: Pushes for affection or sex without consent or mutual desire.
- Male logic supremacy: Dismisses emotions; insists only “logical” arguments are valid.
- Seizing/releasing control: Makes unilateral decisions or withdraws responsibility at will.
- Forced pardoning: Demands forgiveness or uses apologies to reset conflict without resolution.
2. Chauvinism in Crisis Situations
- Hypercontrol/criticism: Increases scrutiny when the partner becomes more independent.
- Fake help: Offers support in words, but not in actions.
- Passive resistance/distance: Withdraws emotionally or physically to discourage partner’s empowerment.
- “Come what may”: Withholds effort to change or engage, hoping the partner will give up.
- Criticism of communication: Invalidates partner’s requests by focusing on how they were expressed.
- Avoiding discussion: Refuses to acknowledge or discuss concerns.
- Promise-keeping for gain: Makes superficial changes or empty promises to end complaints.
- Martyrdom: Plays the victim to avoid accountability.
- Time-wasting: Stalls change or discussions (“I need time,” “Let’s see.”)
- Inducing pity: Uses self-neglect, illness, or threats of self-harm to elicit sympathy and retain power.
3. Covert Everyday Male Chauvinism
- Silence: Uses lack of communication as control (ignores, refuses to explain).
- Manipulative moods: Gets angry or moody to avoid closeness or responsibility.
- Rationed availability: Withholds appreciation, affection, or help.
- Invading intimacy with outsiders: Fills private time with guests, hobbies, or distractions.
- Defensive-attacking communication: Uses blame to shut down discussions.
- Lying/misleading: Omits or distorts facts to avoid accountability.
- Fake negotiation: Pretends to compromise but keeps control.
- Ceremonial presence: Appears involved (e.g., at events) but disengaged in practice.
- Undermining authority: Belittles partner’s opinions or intelligence.
- Not acknowledging contributions: Ignores or downplays partner’s efforts.
- Outsider collusion: Turns family/friends against the partner.
- Micro-terrorism: Publicly shames or mocks the partner.
4. Utilitarian Everyday Male Chauvinism
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Avoidance of housework: Contributes nothing, little, or only when it benefits him.
- Includes: fake or strategic cooperation, disappearing during shared tasks.
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Exploitation of care roles:
- Takes emotional/physical care as a given.
- Expects help with “men’s work” without reciprocation.
- Claims sole rights to major decisions (e.g., signing authority).
These behaviors are usually systematic, subtle, and normalized, making them difficult to recognize individually but powerful when viewed as patterns of control and dominance.
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… and along with all the other shit…
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Game… ova!
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