i applaud whoever took the time to write that. wish it would’ve covered people who are talking on the damn phone. i mean, REALLY? the people on the other end can hear that you’re in the bathroom, ew!
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Or in the next stall?
Have you seen this? It’s hilarious.
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haha, awesome 
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Santa believers?
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I read this show’s title as “Beethoven’s Ninth with Iron Maiden.”
I thought, “well that will be different.”
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@RAvery and @Nonentity, both of those really had me laughing.
Thanks for the belated Xmas presents.
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Maybe you’ve seen either the question to Tech Support or the answer from Tech Support before, but I saw it today for first time.
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems but to no avail. What can I do?
Signed: Desperate
The response (that came weeks later out of the blue)
Dear Desperate,
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: I thought you loved me.html and try to download Tears 6.2. Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the Tears application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta version.
Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 as it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources. In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0.
Good Luck
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From last November. I was wondering if they’d been affected by the SAG strike, so I looked it up!
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That is 100% accurate.
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I have been reliably informed that it’s a whole different kettle of fish when the person pees standing up. My Ernie (apparently) wants to attack with the stream. From across the house, one shiny morning, I heard “what the fuck, Ernie!”
He just asks me to scritch his head, for which I am grateful.
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This is why I prefer dogs.
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