Weird, odd stuff

awaken-sad-1335835147

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todays-xkcd

merelygifted

We once had a Greyhound x Airedale Lurcher. Astra, like many Lurchers, was a thief.

A friend came over, and took off his watch & left on it the arm of the loveseat before going out to the kitchen to wash his hands. When he returned, his watch was gone.

All three of us completely forgot about this.

For Two Years we’d hear a watch alarm go off at the same time every afternoon. After a while, we laughed about it, and when it went off, one of us would usually say, “Oh! It’s time!” What exactly it was time for was naturally never discussed.

Mom finally decided she’d had enough one afternoon, and began a thorough search of the living room, where the sound was the loudest. She and I looked between, behind, and underneath the loveseat and couch cushions. She poked around under all the furniture with a yardstick. Astra watched with interest, and then dismay as mom found her stash of Stolen Goods under the small bookcase, which included a piece of V stale toast, a few cat toys, a small pile of dry dog food, some very old dog treats, a few other items, and our friend’s watch!

Astra wore an expression of, “Oh noes! They be stealin mah stash!” but we mercilessly cleared it up, and cleaned the salvageable items. Our friend’s watch was waterproof, so mom thoroughly washed it, and placed it where Astra couldn’t access it.

The next time our friend came over, mom triumphantly told the tale I’ve just told you, and he was best pleased. Mom recovered the watch from its hiding place, and returned it to him. He promptly put it down on the arm of the loveseat, and went out to the kitchen to wash his hands.

Astra got up from her bed under the bay windows, walked through the living room, passing the loveseat. As she did, she barely turned her head, and quite nonchalantly picked up his watch in her mouth as she kept walking along! Mom and I both saw this and laughingly yelled at her. Mom grabbed the watch outta her mouth, went out to the kitchen, and laughingly yelled at our friend for having repeated his performance, and explained that Astra had repeated her own!

He cracked up. Mom handed him the watch, so he could wash it himself this ahem time.

He did so, and then put it on his wrist.

Astra went back to her bed, looking very disappointed by humankind.

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My BF sent me this yesterday
Hey y'all look at me

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But but but I thought the moon landing was a hoax?

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But the secret moon landing was real.

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Maybe he was watching For All Mankind and thought it was a documentary.

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Doug Jones?!

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That’s nothing, though, compared to what happened with the McDonald’s Moon Man in the decades after the TV campaign faded ( a brief appearance in the 17th season of The Simpsons notwithstanding). Something Awful/4chan spinoff YTMND is responsible for dozens, if not hundreds, of the Internet’s best-known memes. But much like 4chan’s /b/ board, it’s also home to some of the most repulsive, violent, racist content found on the English-language internet. No recurring YTMND character represents this more than the repurposed “Moon Man,” liberated from his YouTube hell into a looping GIF that spews racist and homophobic hatred from atop a Big Mac. Yeah, it’s weird. (This video is probably NSFW.)

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Florida Man Convicted For Pretending To Be Flight Attendant To Take 120 Free Flights

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Apparently thos video is big on some Part of the internet that I’m not on.

Algorithms pushed me until I had to figure it out. Still I have no idea why.

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DIY Vasectomy?

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Holy shit! Sharknado is real!!

Marlowe and three of his friends were at Hole 11 at the Splinter City Disc Golf Course in Myrtle Beach on the morning of May 18 when they saw an osprey carrying its latest catch in its mouth, he said.
The group watched as two crows chased the osprey into some trees.

Oh, nevermind. Just corvids mugging another bird that was hunting sharks. Carry on!

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The choreography and dancing is pretty amazing. The dancers are very good. Not sure I care for the tune.

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Seriously?? Ugh…he just comes to mind for me because of Seth Meyer’s Friday Corrections segment (I believe he mentioned being afraid of the character once and now his fans keep sending him Mac Tonight gifts). Internet assholes ruin everything. Thank you for the heads up. I try not to reserve too much head space for the assholes, but I’ll try to be more wary.

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They warned us!

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“we got cows!”

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This seems dystopian…

NC, US
Lone Wolf, a military robotic dog, entertains children at the America 250 Celebration at Fort Bragg in Fayetteville
Photograph: Karl DeBlaker/AP

Yikes…

Via…

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