Can I pick a fictional part of the world?
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You bet! That’s the sort of thing that Alternate Earth is good for. We tend to be pretty fast and loose with character generation, so my guideline is “run with it”. In the exceedingly rare cases where an origin might clash with the game in some way, we’ll work it out.
7 Likes
_What is your name?_
Maud d’Oilly
What part of the world were you born in?
Noyers, Yonne, Bourgogne, France
What year was that? (note: must be prior to 1250 CE)
1062 CE
What badass sword do you have in your hand right now*?
Dandy Burdock Slashmaster, made by Fentiman
_Which band will eventually be tapped to do your soundtrack?_
Focus, Dutch prog rock band
For a reroll on your lowest stat, tell us about the moment in which you discovered or realized that you were counted among the immortals.
When I first picked up my sword and some jerk grunted and mimed difficulty lifting it to the merriment of other men, I yelled “Rosbifs! Vos mères sucent des ours dans la forêt!!” They ran away crying, probably to eat some boiled pudding with no cutlery.
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- My name is Rachel McGinty
- I was born on a farm with no name. The first time I knew where I was, I was in Aberdeen, Scotland.
- When I found myself free in Aberdeen, it was 1205, and I was still a young woman. I don’t know what year I was born.
- My sword is this one:
- Concrete Blonde will do my soundtrack
I realized I was an immortal when I killed the man who stole me and held me captive. That was his sword, I cut off his head and ran off with it. When his henchmen tried to stop me, they couldn’t kill me.
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- What is your name? Aeaba Teytor
- What part of the world were you born in? Albion … err, England
- What year was that? (note: must be prior to 1250 CE) 900
- What badass sword do you have in your hand right now*? The Mightier Sword (the unfortunate result of an unintentionally punny commission; no it doesn’t write “REALLY BIG LETTERS”)
- Which band will eventually be tapped to do your soundtrack? They Might Be Giants
- For a reroll on your lowest stat, tell us about the moment in which you discovered or realized that you were counted among the immortals: Aeaba should have figured it out a number of times. She was an extremely clumsy mortal. Shear dumb luck prevented her rebirth as an immortal until she turned 28. She “died” in a tavern fight when she stepped in front of a knife on accident. She wasn’t cut. She stumbled backward and hit her head on a table.
16 Likes
Those that have survived know me only as the Ratchet. Lost to the mists of time I was once known to the peasants of Haemus as Baron Tomo Ustavljački Tocak Ručica. My plagued reign upon the Earth began in the year 666 of your Lord.
I find few worthy of the word foe, I mainly dispatch pests with an iron bar; those of Our Kind taste the sharp edge of my kilij, Pokolj.
Silence follows in my wake.
For a change of pace I have been known to enjoy a bit of ABBA. You really can move to it, you know?
I first discovered my true nature as a young man, it was the year 682 and as I was beating an errant urchin to death for muddying my cloak it’s bastard sibling pierced my back straight through with a pitchfork. The surprise at its impertinence did not dissuade me from the task at hand, nor dispatching the other. Staggering home I collapsed in the middle of the high road. The peasants dared not touch me until my family arrived; the timing of which coincided with my rising unscathed from the mortal wounds. Disowned by my father as a demon, I returned that night and slew him and thus assumed his title. It was not for another hundred and fifteen years that I would be driven from my estate when the bothersome priest organized the locals to drive me out as hellspawn. Since that time I have roamed destroying those hated houses of worship.
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please allow me to introduce myself
I’m immortal,
of wealth,
and taste.
Been around for some badass years
Stole many a soul’s
hope and faith.
And I was 'round when Ole Gonville
Had his moment of doubt and pain.
Made damn sure that Cougar,
Ate her pizza,
and sealed her fate.
Pleased to meet you!
Hope you guess my name.
But what’s puzzling you is the
nature of my game.
I stuck around St. Beebessburg,
until I saw it was a time for a change.
Left the mod, and his minotaurs,
as the others, screamed in vain.
I exit left, held the banker’s flank
when the gamerkrieg raged, and the comments stank.
Pleased to meet you.
Hope you guessed my name.
Micawber.
Anyone but Oasis.
There’s that time I went dancing in the sheets…
12 Likes
Shuffles in quietly…
What is your name?
Zero Demos
What part of the world were you born in?
Thera, but you probably know it as Santorini
What year was that? (note: must be prior to 1250 CE)
I can’t honestly remember. Something like 1600 BCE.
What badass sword do you have in your hand right now*?
A Damascus sword, made of finest wootz steel.
Which band will eventually be tapped to do your soundtrack?
Vangelis. Or Nana Mouskouri.
For a reroll on your lowest stat, tell us about the moment in which you discovered or realized that you were counted among the immortals.
If you know your prehistory, you’ll know that Santorini wasn’t a terribly great place to be 3500 years ago. Getting a volcano dropped on my head while I was out fishing with my brother was a bit of a shock. Waking up buried in lava was an even bigger one. Took (literally) lifetimes to dig myself out. I’ve had a bit of an issue with confined spaces ever since.
15 Likes
- What is your name?
Bark McBarkruff
- What part of the world were you born in?
Bark bark bark bark. Woof bark bark bark woof ruff.
- What year was that? (note: must be prior to 1250 CE)
Bark bark ruff.
- What badass sword do you have in your hand right now?
- Which band will eventually be tapped to do your soundtrack?
Ruffbark Woofwoof
- For a reroll on your lowest stat, tell us about the moment in which you discovered or realized that you were counted among the immortals.
Woof woof ruffbark woof barkruff. Grrrrrruff bark woof bark barkwoof ruff. Barkruff yip rufff wooof.
15 Likes
What is your name?
Maple, Daughter of Pudf, Moosekin of the Clan Clamphoof
What part of the world were you born in?
Deep in the redwood forests of what will later be referred to as Canada
What year was that? (note: must be prior to 1250 CE)
424 CE
What badass sword do you have in your hand right now*?
Which band will eventually be tapped to do your soundtrack?
Disasterpeace, Disasteradio, or at least something retrofuturistic and synthwavey.
For a reroll on your lowest stat, tell us about the moment in which you discovered or realized that you were counted among the immortals.
After being slain in raid on a native american settlement I awoke after being slapped in the face by a beaver tail. I had fallen in a river and had ended up stranded behind a beaver dam. My lungs full, I coughed up so much liquid, painfully extracted several broken arrows from my chest and limbs and started back towards my village, wherever that might be.
On the way back I bumped into an old friend. They were incredulous that I was alive, they saw me fall from a high cliff with arrows in my front and back. I should be dead, that much was true.
I’ve ben cut through, had an arrow through the heart, and been left for dead many times since. I’m something of a myth among my people. A moosekin spirit lost somewhere between the trees and the forest, assisting those in need when dire times come.
I travel between villages, working my trade as a story teller and councillor. Of course I tell my now ancient stories in the third-person. Because of my young appearance, very few would begin to suspect that I am that very legend.
14 Likes
Man, your dedication to Moosekind is so much deeper than is mine to Space Lizards.
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Beauty is only skin deep, and lizards ain’t admired for their skin.
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I’m bored, anyone have any blow?
You mean, besides all the drugs that haven’t killed me?
This infernal world-wide-web-page refuses to allow me to submit infinite images.
So I did what any good scratch would do - I created a pinterest!
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I have a headcanon about the badass-brand moose.
In Badass Space Dragons, the Space Moose peoples are an accidentally uplifted race from Old Earth who are now warp-capable.
This being Alternate Earth, the Moose-kin are a created magically/celestially/god-forsaken/whatever chimera race of man and moose. Obviously.
13 Likes
- What is your name?
I am Bag of Hammers, known to those who know me as BAG OF HAMMERS.
-
What part of the world were you born in?
Um, Hammers. It’s a little tourist trap outside Cappadocia.
-
What year was that? (note: must be prior to 1250 CE)
Well, hmm. I don’t rightly recall, as I was pretty young then. But from the wrinkles on mom’s face, let’s say…729 CE.
-
What badass sword do you have in your hand right now*? "Good Old N. 2", aka Skritcher of the Gods, their Cats, and My Butt. That's right, you heard me. Draw!
-
Which band will eventually be tapped to do your soundtrack? Sparks. -
For a reroll on your lowest stat, tell us about the moment in which you discovered or realized that you were counted among the immortals.
Well, it’d have to be when I was out grouse-pincing on the moors, and a mate said, “Hey, you go pince that grouse over by those deer. I’m just gonna take a wee snooze here.” So off I popped, never minding the two stags that were scrapping over the does, and charging at each other. They crashed together with a thunderous clack, which might sound romantic, had I not been at the center of that clack, with twenty-some-odd points of anler perforating my tender bod.
My mate dawdled to my side and gave me a quaff, which sprinkled cartoon-like on the unmoved heather which I lay on.
“I’ll die of thirst!” I cried.
“Ya daft ijjit, yer a Immortal, like!” said my pal, who immediately ceased worry, and back went quickly to his nap.
That was a real eye-opener, that day.
13 Likes
Grrrbark woofwoof rrrruff grrrrrr… haaaack haaaaaaccccckkkkk kffff grrraaaHEM !!
Mmmhmmm, excuse me, please! Apologies - my assistant just reminded me that I need to clear my throat before I speak, if I want anyone to understand what I’m saying.
What a delight it is to have someone around who is concerned with my well-being. After so many hundreds of years in which the suggestions of “throat clearing” were made by weapon-wielding zealots, it’s a refreshing change of pace.
I just wanted to let you know that I have a distant relation who may be able to help you out.
10 Likes
Name- Shemp
Born- 2,344 BC in southern Babylonia
Badass sword- My sword is made of a giant lobster claw. You can laugh now but you won’t be laughing when I crack you head off. Clickity, clack!
Sound track - Seu Jorge
Story- I am Noah’s fourth and youngest son. In the confusion with getting all the animals on board everyone forgot about me. Left off the ark I floated my way through the flood. I might have died of loneliness if I hadn’t met Moe my pet jellyfish. Together Moe and I made it through the flood and built out first ship out of driftwood. We sailed the high seas wreaking revenge upon any children of Noah who dared to cross our path. We attracted a large crew because pirating is quite profitable. In 1886 BC Moe and I realized that we had outlived countless generations of our crew. That’s when we both realized that we were immortal and we have been sailing the high seas together wreaking havoc ever since.
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*** B O Y ! ***
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-
Groß Wilhelm
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The Hellscapes near Bad Doberan.
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419 CE
-
A huge Zweihänder. Its pretty dull due to wear.
-
Rammstein
-
Was walking through a town, recently off trail guarding a turnip wagon, when a fairly full iron chamber pot caught me on my head. When I awoke, someone had drug me out near the trees. Though I stank, quite a lot, and had much blood on my person, no injury could I find.
13 Likes
Highlander?!? I’d planned on just lurking this time, so I could figure out how to play. But I just can’t resist the call of the Gathering…
I am Yevgeniya Nikolaevna Vovk. These days I go by Evelyn Wolff. Call me Evvy, all my friends do.
I was found in Kievan Rus’, just outside a small village near Pereyaslavl, in the year 1199. It’s part of the Ukraine now, I think. I haven’t been back home in decades.
I’ve got a lovely karabela, like this one:
It belonged to a dear friend of mine. One hundred fifty years or so ago, he went off to fight a Challenge… and lost. I’ve no doubt it was a fair fight. He was always so noble, so honorable. Didn’t help him much in the end. So I bear his sword as a reminder of the most important thing he ever taught me… too much honor and fair play will get you killed.
Hmmm. I think I’d choose… either Finger Eleven, around the time they did The Greyest of Blue Skies album… or Foxy Shazam, Welcome to the Church of Rock and Roll-style. Their third album’s good too. ~starts singing enthusiastically and completely off-key~ “Keep the flowers, I’ll just send them back-- the only way to my heart is with an axe…” It’s perfect, right? ~laughs~
~there is a long pause~
It happened in stages. My first death was an accident. We were bringing in the harvest, and my son (foster son, of course) lost control of his scythe. It hit me in the head. I remember the pain, falling to the dirt, seeing the tears in his eyes as the world faded away…
…only for me to wake, hours later, looking up into the startled face of my husband, Sergey. It was a miracle, a joyful miracle. After that, any injuries I suffered healed themselves almost instantly. It seemed like a blessed gift…
…until the Mongols swept through, on their way to raid Kiev.
I’m sure I don’t need to describe it to you. You’ve heard it a hundred times before… ~taps the listener’s Watcher tattoo on their wrist~ …waking up in a field full of corpses. Wondering what I could possibly have done for God to forsake me so, leaving me behind while taking my whole family, my whole village…
~reaches down the counter for her shot glass and drains the vodka within in one swallow. There is another pause~
I’m not sure how long it was before I met my first teacher. I think it was about three months later. I wasn’t thinking too clearly then, but there was snow on the ground. He was a merchant with a caravan from Greece, looking for places to trade. He recognized me for what I was, a newborn Immortal. And he taught me what I was, how to wield a blade… about the Game.
What happened to him? I don’t know. We parted company forty years later, after I’d learned all he could teach me. I’ve been so many things since then-- merchant, spy, thief, governess… now I’m a Web designer, and I teach a class or two at a local community college. I’d like to think he’d be proud of me, for surviving so long. But sooner or later, the Gathering will come… and as much as I want to live, I hate the thought that someday, I might see him on the other side of my blade. I’m tired of fighting. I’d like to live peacefully. But I’ll do whatever I have to to survive.
Sorry, all, she likes to talk. A lot. I hope that will help… since I haven’t role-played before.
15 Likes