A cursed oxymoron 
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He’s 82. 
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This is very on brand for Toms River. New Jersey may be blue, but it has some pockets of hardcore Trumpers.
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Fuck Cuomo.
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He might be Italian.
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I’m just stunned that Cuomo is so far ahead in the Democratic primary. WTF is wrong with people?
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Basically he is the only name people recognize.
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What a fucking shit race.
Adams is running as an independent because of his legal problems.
And a disgraced Cuomo is back running as both a Dem and under a new party he made up to make sure he’s in the ballot.
The Dems shouldn’t let him be on their ballot if he’s on another.
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Jesus, two DINOs and a Republican. That means there’s a good chance the Republican could win.
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Except that Italy wasn’t a country until 1861… so he might be Genovesan? Or I’d heard some say he might be Polish…
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More info. This is not the bar owner’s first experience with being an asshole.
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He had meant to ax a $150,000 grant to fund a Native American homelessness liaison position.
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He needs a visit from the FU Street Band.
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I’ve felt like a certain amount of what the Onion is doing these days is deliberately prognostication rather than satire, because they recognize that, in certain areas, prognostication is indistinguishable from satire (at least until it becomes true).
One nice thing about the Trump administration is that they’re (accurately) demonstrating what the opposite of “DEI” is - utterly unqualified, completely incompetent, cis white men getting jobs purely because of their personal connections.
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Reminds me of The Onion headline when Bush Jr won in 2000: “Our long national nightmare of peace and prosperity is finally over”. The article went on to describe how at least one war in an oil-rich country was likely, etc.
I’m not an expert; is this prognostication a particular branch of satire, or just plain “satire” or is there another name entirely?
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“Prognosatire” or “prognostisatire”
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